The Importance of Paying Attention to your Relationship Priorities

Think of your relationship as an empty vase. Now, let’s fill that vase with rocks, pebbles, and sand. I put together a demonstration so you can see exactly what this looks like.

We’re first going to fill with rocks. The rocks are the foundation of a fulfilled relationship: things like shared values, mutual respect, good communication, honestly, friendship, healthy boundaries, and healthy intimacy.

Now we put in the pebbles. The pebbles represent things in your relationship that matter, but you could survive without. They can come and go and aren’t essential to an overall healthy relationship. This might be shared hobbies and spirituality practices, common friend group, and similar family backgrounds.

The sand is the remaining filler in your life, that doesn’t mean as much to you. This might be the same taste in music, food or a political view.

But if you start filling your vase with the sand, you won’t have room for the rocks and pebbles.

This is true for the things that you let in your relationship. If you spend all your time on the smaller, less significant things, like sand, you run out of room for the critical things, like the rocks.

So, pay attention to the rocks. They are essential to the health of your relationship.

 

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